I Think I’m Having A Baby…..

Not exactly something you want to hear from your SIX YEAR OLD DAUGHTER, but on Saturday, these were the words that were screamed at me.

Eva was struggling with an extremely bad stomach and I admit, I didn’t know what to do to help her as she was writhing around on the floor.  We’d tried a warm bath, hot water bottle, rubbing her tummy, Calpol but nothing was working.  I thought she was being (a touch) over dramatic, but after her announcing that she thought she was having a baby and partaking in some labour-like panting, I decided this was serious.  So as you do, I turned to google.  Her symptoms via google, were diagnosed as appendicitis. :-0  Cue a frantic and teary call to my mum (always to my mum first), other half and NHS direct which resulted in Olivia and Frankie being rushed off to their Grampa,  OH leaving work early, and a trip to the hospital.  Turns out this was just a 48 hour bug, combined with colic – which can induce agonising spasms.  Phew.

I know what you’re wondering though, how the hell does a six-year-old have any idea what it’s like to  be having a baby?  I asked myself the same.   Then it clicked, two years ago, a four-year-old Eva got up in the early hours of the morning  and cuddled me on the sofa while I was in early labour with her brother.  Obviously, I tried to be brave so as not to scar my little girl for life, but I gather the manic grin I’d plastered on my face, my oddly contorted body  and the odd inescapable groan/screech/panting combo I let out must have conveyed this was pretty darn painful.

Oooops.  Hopefully, this hasn’t put her off providing me with grandchildren aplenty in the (very) distant future.

Where Do You Keep Yours????

So, here we are with 15 days until Christmas (woo-hoo), and I was sure that this would be the year that I would be organised and super-mum-like and give Santa a little helping hand with the present buying. I had envisioned that everything would be bought and wrapped by the 10th – giving me time to make Christmas cards, and cookies and heck, maybe even a mince pie or two…. In reality, as if! I am about half way there though, and for me that’s organised. For this, though, I am rewarded with a new problem – where to hide all this stuff!?

 

A quick Google search (for research purposes, obviously, not because I have too much time on my hands) shows that the common conclusion is to hide them in the wardrobe. Now, if like me, your wardrobe doesn’t open out to Narnia, you don’t have a garage or a spare room and underneath your bed is already home to a storage unit, a half finished book and the long lost TV remote, where do you hide the presents? At the moment, mine are in black bags, disguised as bags full of rubbish, stuffed into anywhere there’s space, mainly the shoe cupboard. Cunning, huh? Not really, I am on pins every time one of the children go in there to find a shoe or their jacket. Aaaargh.

 

While slowly running out of space and with suspicious children wondering why I’m acting bizarre (to say the least )every time they even go near a cupboard, I asked myself how I haven’t encountered this problem before?  How, when I’ve been doing this for 6 years, do I not have a solution for this? Then it dawned on me that I am usually still flapping around town on Christmas Eve like a big ball of stress,  searching for the sold-out-everywhere things that are on the children’s lists and panic buying random things that the children haven’t even asked for!   Aaah, Christmas, don’t you just love it?