And so, to the New Year…

So, there we have it.  Christmas and New Year is over for another year, the decorations are down, new toys put away (sort of) and the rubbish has been collected.  Always a sign that things are back to normal.

Was it all worth it?  The effort, the money (oh, the money), the worry of ‘have the children got enough’, the pressure to make the season memorable and, well, Christmassy, and did I mention the money?

Of course it was.  Who didn’t sit there basking in satisfaction as their friends/family/children ripped open their carefully chosen (and not panic bought minutes before the shops closed – honest) presents.  I for one was pretty pleased with myself, as the children opened everything that was on their list, plus plenty of extra presents, until a certain little madam surveyed the living room and declared ‘Oh, I haven’t got much.’

Aaaaaaarrrrrggggghhhhh.  Like a knife to the heart.  Anyway, it was a great Christmas, despite a little ungratefulness.

And so to the New Year.  I’m not really a fan, I find people act strangely at New Year, especially with a drink down them, and it’s never as good a night as you want or expect it to be.  So, as is tradition in our house the children went to bed as normal, and me and him indoors played Super Mario. Then went to bed. We do acknowledge the New Year, though, with a special candlelit dinner.  Perfect.

I am excited for this year though, hopefully it will be the year I conquer The Driving Test, which is really turning out to be my Achilles heel.  If I’m not in the wrong lane, I’m driving 10 mph too slow or nudging, NUDGING the kerb in a parallel park ffs!  I’m not a boy racer or dangerous driver,  just pass me you miserable b*****ds!!!  Sorry.

It will be the year when I reach my goal of being a size 10 again, I will work for it instead of just expecting my body to eventually just shrink back down.  It is not happening, so I will, in fact, have to partake in some exercise and lower my food consumption.  See, it’s easy.

I also aim to buy some clothes, I don’t say this to shock, but I hate shopping  (apart from grocery shopping, a full cupboard and fridge gives me great satisfaction) I have about 6 items in my wardrobe, none of them nice, and feel that at the age of 28 I need to, as I have mentioned before find my ‘style’.

I also want to have as much fun and quality time (I hate that phrase) with my gorgeous, gorgeous, beautiful, clever, funny children.  The girls are growing up so fast and Frankie will be starting school late this year (this year!!!! Noooooo!) and I will make the most of them wanting me around them, because before long, they wont. Sob sob.

So, Happy New Year to you all, hope you all achieve exactly what you want this year and enjoy yourself in doing so.

xxxx

About My Blog

Yes!  We Do Have A TV!!! What’s it all about?

Well, this is about me, my trials and tribulations in bringing up my family, the questions I am pondering and would like your opinion on, my mum-fessions or triumphs and maybe a funny anecdote thrown in!

It all started when I began to think I was the only person – IN THE WORLD – to have more than one child (apart from the women who reproduce to increase their state benefits – erm, yes I confess, I have read the Daily Mail).  I went on an internet search to find out if there were other Mums of 1+ out there and came across the phenomenon of Parent Blogs! Whoop. There are, in fact, Mums and Dads of 2, 3, 4 and more out there!  I was hooked in reading other parent’s experiences and stories so thought I would join in.

The name of the blog is my response to the question people (even STRANGERS) repeatedly felt it appropriate to ask me when I was pregnant for the third time:

“Christ!  Don’t you have a TV in your house?”

Grrrrrrrrrrr!

We love our children, we wanted our children, we pay for our children!

And I’m not alone!!!

How Do You Know When Your Done?????

On Saturday I went to visit my 87-year-old Nan.  She only lives 20 minutes away from me and I see her around 4 times a week.  Either me and the boy take a stroll down to her for a cuppa and a Welsh cake or she will take her exercise with a walk up to mine.

Mother Hen!

My Nan is an absolutely amazing woman, and I admire and love her so much. She is the mother of 12 children who has been through so much, both as a wife and as a mother.  She is the absolute strongest woman I know.  My Nan is the best!!!!

Anyway, on Saturday she was telling me that she had been to church that morning, while there she saw a lady nursing a baby.  My Nan then said that she had a deep yearning to have a baby in her arms.  At the age of 87 my Nan was feeling broody!!

This got me wondering when or if you ever really know when your family is complete.  My mum knew without a doubt that her third daughter, my youngest sister, was her last baby and she never ever had second thoughts on that. Then my step-dad went and got ‘fixed’. When I had F, after having my two girls, I thought that was it – I could throw out the manky (but expensive) maternity bras, and clothes and get into shape once and for all…..  For your information, I am still wearing those above mentioned bras, when all the others are in the washing plus I am still not in shape!…………..And, I am now wondering what it would be like to have another addition.

(I’ll give you a second to take that in…..Yes, I know I already have 3)

It’s not that I am obsessed with just babies.  It’s the idea of them growing up, us all being close, the house always being full, them bringing their boyfriends/girlfriends home, the family gatherings, the weddings, the grandchildren (how can I be thinking of grandchildren at 28?!)  I just cannot shake the feeling of broodiness.  Will I ever shake it?

On the other hand though, I am looking forward to the children growing up a bit.  Rob and I have never, not once, had a night to ourselves since having children.  In the last year, the girls have started sleeping over at my mum’s every couple of months, but we’ve still had F with us as he is very clingy.  When he’s a bit older he will be able to sleep out too.  We will have a bit of freedom!  I am also looking forward to maybe getting some sort of career or dong some studying when F starts school.  I will have some time to myself to read a book or do the grocery shop alone and in under 2 hours!!! I can have a shower in the morning for longer than 90 seconds – any longer and that boy will causing some SERIOUS mischief. I can get the ironing done in one go, instead of having to fit bouts of it in around doing jigsaws, shape sorting, colouring, playing cars, being a horse, having my belly used as a trampoline……..

But would I appreciate this time to myself…..or would I miss having someone else to focus on, instead of myself.  I feel like being a mum is all I know and looking at my three beautiful, amazing geniuses – I’m pretty blimming good at it!  Probably the only thing I am good at.

Maybe it’s the fact that I am worried what I’ll do with myself when all three children are at school.  Maybe I am hiding behind the fact that when they’re all in school – I will have to face the big bad world and grow up a bit myself!!!!

I know Rob would never consider having another baby and really, I know that it is not very practical.  I think this is a case of my heart trying to rule my head and it’s probably something that will pass. Hopefully.  Hearing my Nan say that she had a longing for a baby (at 87, let me remind you) made me feel really sad – is wanting a child an instinct that the majority of women have and never get over?  I don’t want to feel broody for the rest of my life so do you really know when your family is done or do you make the decision for financial/personal/practical reasons, and just deal with that decision for the rest of your life.

I would love to hear from you mum’s or dad’s who know for definite that their family is complete and how did you know that for sure??

A Case of ‘The Grass is Always Greener’?

Well, for those who have visited this blog before, you will probably know that I have a ‘other half’ Rob, we are engaged and we have our three children, and the dog.  And I wouldn’t change things for the world…….Although, sometimes, I have to admit to feeling little pangs of…not jealousy, maybe regret that I didn’t do things a little differently.

Let me begin

My best friend recently got married.  She had the most beautiful wedding abroad, to a man she had been with for 9 years, she has a successful career and (wait for it) a mortgage to boot!  These things, I do not have.

Now that she is married, she will have the luxury and excitement of planning a family and actually trying for a baby.  Instead of just finding herself pregnant (eh-hem, that’s right I found myself with child, at not the most appropriate of times).

She will have the excitement each month of peeing on a stick and praying for it to be positive ( it was the other way round for me, the first time – how awful), the grand announcement to her family, who will all be delighted to hear that she is expecting. Hugs will be had and tears will be shed.  Not the nearly passing out with fear of telling her parents that I had (the first two times anyway).

She will probably even have a baby shower organised  - something I hear is getting quite popular in ol’ Blighty, although, I wouldn’t know – grrrr.

I just feel that, now I have finished with ‘having the baby’s', and it all passed by so quickly, and without much excitement from anyone, I don’t have much to look forward to. I’ve been there, done that, and nobody really cared, except me and Rob of course….Which is all that matters, I hear you cry, and your right, I know that…..I just wish that the announcement of my pregnancies were not shrouded by fear of judgement and worry about how we’d cope financially and emotionally.  Of course, we did cope. All by ourselves. Despite the odds.

Then there’s my other friend, who’s managed to branch out from the city she was born, has a fantastic career, social life and is still single.  She still has the excitement of going out and wondering if Mr. Right is just around the corner.  Or the freedom of only having herself to worry about.  When she does meet Mr.Right she will have all the suspense of when are they going to move in together, when will they buy a dog together, when will they get engaged….Again, I’ve been there done that.  Although, we (not purposely, you understand) had the baby, two of them (!) before we got the dog.

I just can’t help but feel that there is not much left for me.  And just when my children start growing up and I get a bit more freedom, my friends will just be starting their families, and I’ll be the odd one out again.

Saying that, in a couple of years, when F has stopped sharing the bed with us, when I have finally (hopefully) found the Holy Grail of a full nights sleep (which I have not had for 6 and a half years!), when my children are able to entertain themselves for a bit, so I can do the housework, they will be the zombies struggling to get through the day on 4 hours sleep, they will have to learn to accept that having sick and sometimes poo on their clothes is going to be the norm, they will have a house like a complete rubbish dump and no energy to do anything about it, they will have the bleeding nipples, and scars on their nether regions from episiotomy’s (although I wouldn’t wish that on anyone).  And don’t forget the joyless and endless, endless arguments with their other half’s about whose turn it is to bath/put to bed/read the book/get up and see to/put back to bed/change nappy or take to the loo (etc etc) their little ones!

And I will be free from those mostly amazing, yet, thinking back, sometimes hellish days.

So, yes, maybe I do feel envious when they’re jetting off on holidays, or even going on nights out without that knot in the stomach of ‘I hope the kids are ok”, but maybe (I highly doubt it , but maybe) sometimes, they are a little envious of me.  Maybe that’s just life. Maybe everyone thinks, at some point in their life, no matter how well their doing, that someone else’s grass is just a little bit greener……I bet you do!

And we are still great friends, despite our lack of things in common (apart from our bygone years of school or drunken nights out) and will always will be.  Even though I don’t see them nearly as often as I should.

So note to self:  stop viewing everyone else’s life through rose tinted glasses, (jeez, how many cliche sayings do I want to put in here?) because whose life do I really want?  Mine!!!!! I wouldn’t change it for anything!!!! How could I ever, ever question perfection?